Thats my bestfriend. She a real bad bitch!

 I binged watched " And Just Like That: Sex and The City" over the holidays, and I really enjoyed it. It made me think about the topic of friendship. Samantha's presence is missed, but it has made this season of the show incredibly realistic. Friendships end, people move on, and life takes us in different directions. On my own personal healing journey Ive had to get out of the habit of expecting every friendship I had with another woman to manifest into the bestfriend of my life. I blame it on my daddy issues. Daddy issues can manifest in every arena of our life from jobs to men to friendships. The more I started to focus on becoming a whole and complete individual that was intentional about giving herself the love I gave others, the more this habit faded. I stopped expecting my friendships to sooth the trauma that came with growing up in a single parent household. I started to give to myself the love the little girl within me needed without hoping my friendships would fill the voids of my inner child. This helped me to stop expecting certain behaviors of my friends. I always see tweets on Twitter about monitoring your spiritual hygiene by being wholeheartedly cognizant of who you allow in your life. The truth is most people wont be the bestfriend of your life, and dont even deserve to be. Your friendship is a privilege, luxury, and blessing.  I also feel like most people will experience healthier friendships when they accept their friends for the roles they are showing you they want to play instead of the roles we want them to fulfill. Actions speak volumes, and people tend to show you how they want to be in your life. Dont expect the friend you book sections with at the strip club to be the friend  that comes over and makes you soup when youre sick. Dont expect the friend that you can start a business with to be the same friend you book a trip out of the country with. Its perfectly okay to compartmentalize your friendships to suit you in a manner that is fluid with your needs and lifestyle.  The scenes in " Sex and the City" where Miranda is trying to create a rapport with her Black professor also triggered my interest in blogging about friendships. In her attempt to create a relationship instead of just lettting things take its natural course she just made things awkward and overbearing because she was trying too hard. I dont believe in going out of your way to induce feminine bonds. As a daughter of Osun, I try to learn much from the aspect of nature Osun rules: water. Water doesnt cling to one thing or person. it goes with the flow and lets things and people come and go as they please. I believe this can teach us a lot about cultivating friendship. Dont make yourself a pauper trying to enrich the lives of other women. Dont TRY and make friends. Let the universe supply what you need. Women can be very fickle. Theyll love you on Monday and hate you on Sunday for the very things they loved you for. Friends become enemies, and that woman you cant stand can end up being one of the best things to ever happen to you. I hope this year brings you enriching friendships with incredible women and the gumption to make memories with them that will last through the ages.  Go with the flow!

All my love mermaids! xoxo