Why arent you smiling?

" you gotta keep going on"

At forty-four minutes to four
An angel walked up to my door
Opened the windows to my soul
Told me he thinks that I should know
That there's no slowing down
As the globe spins 'round and 'round
You gotta keep going, gotta keep going
Gotta keep going, you gotta keep going
Gotta keep going, you gotta keep going
You gotta keep going, you gotta keep going
You gotta keep going

If there's one thing that I learned
While in those county lines
It's that everything takes time
You have gotta lose your pride
You have gotta lose your mind
Just to find your peace of mind
You have got to trust the signs
Everything will turn out fine

So why aren't you smiling? Why aren't you smiling?
Life can get wild when, you caught in the whirl wind
Lost in the whirl wind, you're chasing the wind
You gotta understand
There's really no end, there's really no beginning
There's really no real, there's really no pretending
There's really no fail, there's really no winning
Cause nothing really is and everything really isn't

At forty-four minutes to four
An angel walked up to my door
Opened the windows to my soul
Told me he thinks that I should know
That life only gets harder but you gotta get stronger
This is for my brother, I do this for my daughter
That's why I keep going, that's why I keep going
That's why I keep going
That's why I keep going, I gotta keep going
I gotta keep going, I gotta keep going
I gotta keep going, gotta keep going
Gotta keep going

I gotta show them, that I can keep going
I gotta keep going, I gotta keep going
I gotta keep going

Why aren't you smiling? Why aren't you smiling?
Life can get wild when, you caught in the whirl wind
Lost in the whirl wind, you're chasing the wind
You gotta understand
There's really no end, there's really no beginning
There's really no real, there's really no pretending
There's really no fail, there's really no winning
Cause nothing really is and everything really isn't
That's why I keep going

My life has been so dark lately. Ive faced much rejection while looking for a job, and I didnt get in the dance company I auditioned for that I was really hoping to get in.There were four deaths in the month of March that took me and my family by complete surprise, one of them being my granddad which im very sad about. Being surrounded by death has me thinking about my own funeral. I dont want the traditional christian ceremony. one of the greatest blessings my ancestors and the universe has blessed me with was taking me out of the church and into african spirituality. ifa is one of my biggest blessings and i want my funeral to mirror this.  I want a huge african festival that feels like a celebration. I want there to be singing and dancing to the orisha. I want my eulogy to be dedicated to sharing with everyone how I tried to be the best daughters of oshun and obatala I could be, and tried to live up to the meanings of my name " being the daughter of oshun completes me" and " obatalas way is the right way". Being in the midst of so much death has me thinking about the meaning of my life. This song by Jhene Aiko  is about standing up in the face of adversity and keep smiling and moving forward in the face of lifes trials and tribulations. This is the type of person id liked to be remembered as. In the song she keeps asking " Why arent you smiling?" I want people to remember me as a person that smiled in her darkest hours. Life is hard and it only gets harder so its important to ask the universe for strength. This post is dedicated to anyone facing challenges in their life. heed jhene Aiko's advice. You gotta keep going.